صداع مزمن ينهش مؤخرة رأسي ... مزمن .. منذ الامس
أعصاب و مشاعر و أفكار ولقطات من أحداث اليوم أو العام الماضي
عروق انفجرت يوماً من نبض الدماء داخلها .. من تصلّب الحزن على جدرانها الداخلية مثل قطع الدهون
من العجز
مؤثرات و محفذات يتم رصدها تلقائياُ, أصوات و أضواء و حركات .. كُلها تُترجم في الحال إلى تفسيرات ذي معنى
في أي دقيقة تفتح رأسك, ستجد قرابة الـ 14 مليار خلية عصبية تُطلِق دفعة من الكيماويات التي تسبب نبضات عصبية بسرعة 450 ميلا في الساعة
ليس لدينا السيطرة على معظمها
عندما يقشعر جسدك من البرد و تنتصب حلمات جلدك
عندما تنتشي أو تتحمس أو تغضب، الأدرينالين ... الإندورفين ... الاستروجين ......... و غيرها
الألم .. لا سيطرة لنا على الاحساس بالألم
الجميع يريد حياة بلا ألم
فَـ المتعة جيدة
و الكثير من المتعة أفضل
نظن أن الألم سيئ
والحقيقة هي أن الألم هو الشعور الوحيد على ما أظن الذي يقول لنا شيئا عن ما يجب أن نفعل أو نغير
هؤلاء الذين لا يشعرون, نحتاج بأن نضع ملصق لوجوههم عند كل منعطف ليذكروننا أن الألم هناك لسببٍ ما
حسناً .. جسمك يتبع بشكل تلقائي طبيعي تلك النبضات العصبية، هذا يجعل من الصعب جدا السيطرة عليه
وبطبيعة الحال، أحيانا لدينا نبضات خاضعة لإرادتنا, نحن لا نرغب في السيطرة عليها فنتجاهل هذا,
و لاحقاُ .. ليس بعد بضعة دقائق أو أيام
نتمنى أن كنا فعلنا
To be a good emergency doctor, you have to think like an emergency doctor
Early detect any alarm signs, like getting any of these
Hopeful
Happy
Flushed
Emotional
Angry
Jealous
Clingy
Sad
Severe decreased efficiency and concentration.....
Don't panic, you are programed to deal with emergencies
You are the only doctor here with this broken heart
back off before it's too late, there are things that you wouldn't be
able to totally take back
Privacy is deadly important ... he said so
close the O.R. and now be strong, control your feelings, and start sewing the pieces back on
see that scar deep inside, it says you may never see him the way you
saw him before
he is not your God any more .. you can't worship him, you only worship your self now
he is not your ultimate or almighty
Where are all the emotions? the poems !!! You used to write poems
love is never pure, it always hurt .. like always, a lot of debris and necrotic tissue every time you open a wound
you can't love for
free, it's not healthy for your heart
and when you do something, you will be waiting for the same
love is not about
anything, we can love some one, and get attracted to another one, and
commit to a third one ... (sex-love-attachment) are three different
things
and any one doesn't get to call you a whore
because when you first met him, you were done
So all the boys and all the bars and all the obvious male to female issues, who cared? Because you were done
but he cheated you, not in his feelings, but he lied, hided the truth, didn't care about the consequences, even though you cleared it out
you are all glued back together now
so make no apologies for how you chose to repair what he broke
no one gets to call you a whore
You are not naive or pure anymore
you shouldn't prefer him over yourself
he went away for a distance .. he came back, but you had already changed, how r u supposed to know that he is comming back !! you've never done this before
its good if he trust that you love him no matter what, but its not any wise, because he will not be attracted to you, and it's not his fault after all, you already lost the lust of playfulness, mystery and uncertainty
he will do whatever he does, and it's fine, because you'll keep accepting him back
Don't keep collecting his photos and sigaretts, u are too pathetic !
you are really old, not
clean, and he -despite loving you deeply- will keep recognizing the difference between you and all the
young stylish clean single playful chicks out there
love really is an act of the will, and it is
voluntary
you see now ????
Emotions are messy
just tuck them neatly away and step into a clean, sterile room where the procedure is simple.
Inhale the happy gas while counting from 1 to 10, then...
cut, resect, suture and close
